ART, LITERATURE, QUOTES, SPIRITUALITY

Being Grateful: Remembering To Be, and Reading Examples Of

Earlier today, a friend was in turmoil – an immense list of things to do weighed on him, yet he was simultaneously drawn to doing nothing. He was a risk of burning out, and needed rest.
He said he was reminded by his sister, a mother with children to take care of, to be grateful for the ability to choose to do nothing.

The freedom to choose what to do at any given moment is a rare treat in this world of demands, expectations, suppression, and control.
Mothers and fathers caring for their children are engaged in an undeniably hefty responsibility 24/7. People oppressed by controlling and unrealistically demanding partners, employers, caregivers, governments, dictators… these people, too, know not the freedom of choice.

Tonight, as I read the May 2010 issue of Art In America, I was pleasantly surprised to notice that not only one, but two majors articles were concluded with the authors’ grace.

Richard Kalina discusses Robert Morris’ recreation of Untitled (Scatter Piece), placing it in historical context compared to it’s original form decades ago.

Robert Morris' "Untitled (Scatter Piece)" at Castelli Warehouse

As a young man Kalina was “guarding” the work at the Castelli Warehouse. With a surprisingly heartfelt memory of the work’s original staging he closes his article by recounting,

When the show ended, he (Morris) gave me the mud-splattered sign by the door – one of the few artifacts, I believe, of the long-destroyed piece – and inscribed it to me. I was, and I am, very grateful.

Eariler in the same Art In America issue, Franz Schulze reviews two books on architecture simultaneously released this spring: Paul Goldberger’s Why Architecture Matters, and Hearts of the City: The Selected Writings of Herbert Muschamp.

Why Architecture Matters by Paul Goldberger

Hearts of the City

In his engaging review (I am far from an architectural scholar; sometimes achieving a sufficient grasp of the subject is beyond me, and as a result, I can not fully appreciate a review of the subject. But Schulze’s voice is intelligent without being convoluted. For this I am grateful), Schulze examines the vast difference between the equally influential writers of and on architecture, Paul Goldberger and Herbert Muschamp.

The former, he says,

is steady, balanced and rational, ecumenical in his tastes, at ease in the mastery of his material. Muschamp by contrast was mercurial, passionate and self-indulgent, as willing to defy convention as to follow it.

Respecting these differences, Schulze elaborates sufficiently on both writers.
He concludes his review by positing their relevance in the here and now:

In view of the present threat to quality print journalism, reading Goldberger and Muschamp leaves us immensely grateful for them both.

The same friend whose turmoil was eased by his sister’s advice has recently discussed with me the problems that are caused due to our modern lives sinking in a pit of overabundant choice.

The ability to choose to do nothing, to take five or ten minutes to sit in silence, to read an issue of Art In America, these are all wonderfully centering and calming, grounding luxuries.
But this luxury conflicts with modern society’s insistence that we should all feel that the world is an unlimited source of anything our greedy hearts desire:
we can and should say anything we want,
we can and should live anywhere we want,
we can and should f**k anyone we want,
we can and should consume anything – food, cars, clothes – we want,
we can and should become as rich and famous as we want, without any concern for anyone (family, friend, partner, lover) or anything (plant, animal, element, resource).

This platter of temptations is unfit even for an omnipotent being with hundreds of thousands of years of experience.
That being, I expect (and hope), would have the wisdom to look upon the platter and be grateful that their plate is completely and utterly empty.

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ART, GRAPHIC DESIGN, LITERATURE, MUSIC, SPIRITUALITY

Stifling Myself With Depression and Perfection

While the 40degree heat is melting everyone in the city,
I’m stifling myself worse by not doing what I need to be doing, which is creating.

From today until the day I die, I am always going to have these things on my person:

  1. a pad/small sketchbook to write words in and to draw in
  2. a camera

I’m going to have these things because I need to be writing, drawing, and shooting photos every single day, for a couple reasons:

  1. doing these thing make me feel good. Sometimes it’s happiness, sometimes it’s relief from depression
  2. I want to get really good at these things, not only in a technical way, and not only to improve my confidence as an artist, but because I NEED more than anything in my life to become the artist that I’m meant to be and I know I am a looooooong way from this.

I’ve been losing my brain so badly this last week or two that I am going to aim to do nothing but write, draw, and photograph.

I need to simplify because the quest for perfection is killing me.
Rather than write a blog post (and I’ve written some rough drafts), I do not post them because I’ve set myself up – I’ve really been enjoying writing mini-essays with accompanying images here on THE MOMENT. To fully flesh out thoughts, and present them in a somewhat professional manner feels good. It’s good for my brain and my soul.

So it feels lazy and like a cop-out and just shitty to just post something brief and unarticulated. But hell, that’s just what I’m going to do from now on. I aim to post once/day.

Also with photos. I take a decent amount of photos, not shooting everyday, but still there are a TON of decent shots that I want to post that I haven’t yet because I like to touch each up just a little, bring out a little more depth, etc. But that aim for perfection holds me back from doing anything at all.
Then I wonder why I’m depressed. So from now on, if I don’t have the time, I’m going to post untouched photos.

Depression. I suffer from depression because I expect too much from myself in every single moment of the day, so I am always disappointed in myself.
I also have incredibly varying self confidence. Sometimes I feel good about myself and the world I live in. But other times (and much more often), I feel like shit and that there’s no point to anything. Because people are shit (I had a brutally discouraging Shambhala experience that shook me deeply. I will post my thoughts on this soon).

To counter this, I’m going to write, draw, and shoot every single day. Because even if I am angry when I”m doing something or sad, it feels good to get stuff out rather than keep it in. Actually, I’m learning that it’s essential.

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ART, LITERATURE, QUOTES, SPIRITUALITY

Art Trickery & Truths

Thanks to Canadian Art mag,
I’ve been exposed to Iris Häussler (www.haeussler.ca),
Gregor Schneider (www.gregorschneider.de),
Christoph BĂĽchel (en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Christoph_Buchel),
and Janet Cardiff (www.cardiffmiller.com),
all because of an intriguing article, Brilliant Disguise: Iris Häussler’s fact-meets-fiction odysseys.

For the reopening of the Art Gallery of Ontario in 2008, Häussler created He Named Her Amber, an archaeological “discovery” of early 19th century art by an Irish maid.

irisHaussler_excavation_CanadianArt_Winter09

But the discovery was not credited to Häussler. It was presented as a legitimate discovery.
Not surprisingly, this was met with mixed reactions once the truth came out.

This fascinates me because I want my art to be as true as possible.
I have considered enlarging journal entries, exposing my frustrations, questions, and failures to the world.
I am tired of the public personas that we are all expected to put on each day of our lives.
I believe that much of our depression is caused by living false lives.
We hold so much in, for fear of how the truth will be interpreted, for fear of what the truth may cause.
But perhaps that fear and the stress it causes is much worse than living open, truthful lives.

In this article, there is a quote by Häussler that stirred another aspect of art in my core.
While speaking about channelling her fictional characters to create sculpture, she says:

It’s like taking off a corset. These characters give me permission. You allow yourself to play, then things come up. Play is what our society is missing so much – it is almost healing.

For months, I have been pursuing my art like never before,
and while it excites me, it also fills me with dread and stress every single day.
Instead of playing, and letting things come up, as Haussler suggests,
more often I am fretting about whether what I am doing is worth it, or whether it’s in the right direction, or even “why have I waited so long to work on my art?”

I long for a return of play to my art.
Perhaps, by relieving myself of the stress of fear, and instead revealing complete truths in my art, I will find a sense of play…?

Below, from the same article, is a shot of the bedroom from The Legacy of Joseph Wagenbach, another work by Häussler from 2006.

irisHaussler_bedroom_CanadianArt_Winter09_rotated

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ART, LITERATURE

Look What I Found In Old Vice Mags

Sure, there was plenty of smut in the good old days of Vice Mag,
but as I was perusing old issues for inspiration, I came across these 2 images that I just HAD to scan.

  1. Millennium Man
  2. A 71-year old security guard who could out-lift and out-run anyone I bet.
    Charming.

    milleniumMan_vice

  3. Sept 11 Cycling
  4. A truly haunting photo by Ryan McGinley (this man’s photos are embedded with thick mood – check his work out at ryanmcginley.com)

    You read right: cycling around NY on Sept 11.
    *skin crawls*

    sept11_RyanMcGinley

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ART, LITERATURE, QUOTES, RULES, SPIRITUALITY

The Fortune Cookie Says…

THE FORTUNE COOKIE

Functioning superbly will come automatically to you

Why, thank you, cookie. You are such a charmer.

The nice thing about receiving this message was that the timing was wonderful, as I was at a business meeting.

I am learning all I can about working for myself, to promote myself, and psyche myself up to do the stuff I love more than anything, which is make art. Sometimes I don’t believe that I function superbly. But now a cookie has told me I do. So I will.

THE POSTER ART

Vincent Parker!

I’ve really been enjoying this guy’s poster art for the Biltmore Cabaret over recent months. Turns out there’s a lot more to him than just a really great, loose drawing style. Check him out at: www.vincentparker.ca

THE RULES

Rule #3 – Always, ALWAYS take time out to read. A little news, a little nonfiction, and a lot a fiction. Get out of your head and into another’s.

THE QUOTE

An artist is a person first. He is an individual. If there is no person, there is no artist. It is of no importance to me whether you wear your payos behind your ears or whether you cut off your hair entirely and go around bald. I am not a defender of payos. Great artists will not give a damn about your payos; they will only give a damn about your art. The artists who will care about your payos are not worth caring about. You want to cut off your payos, go ahead. But do not do it because you think it will make you more acceptable as an artist.

– Jacob Kahn, artist and mentor, speaking to his student in Chaim Potok’s amazing novel “My Name Is Asher Lev” (pg 257)

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ART, GRAPHIC DESIGN, LITERATURE, MUSIC, SPIRITUALITY

The 1st 4 Months of 2010

Well, it’s almost May.
Month #5 in the year, which is almost half-way.
Which makes me start to stress, because I start to think I haven’t accomplished anything.
Then I have to grab me by the scruff of my neck, sit me down,
and say: Look at all the things you’ve done.
I’ve:

  1. Redesigned and launched my personal site, my creative home on the interweb: Format No Auto.com.
    Possibly my biggest accomplishment in a long time, because I’ve been chipping away at a redesign for YEARS. I could have sat on this accomplishment for the rest of the year, that’s how big it is.
    But no, I have waaaay too much in me, so I also:
  2. Started this blog, THE MOMENT, here at WordPress, to get my words out into the universe, and:
  3. Started my Photostream on Flickr, and posted it full of my drawings, photos, and design work.
    I also:
  4. Made a lot, produced a lot, created a lot.
    I did as I promised myself I’d do, and I used the shiny new formatnoauto.com as inspiration to create more than I have in years, to kick it into prolific high gear.
    Lots more photos, drawings, and graphic design on Flickr, as well as lots of writing here, at THE MOMENT.
    I also:
  5. Got eye surgery.
    I’ve been wearing glasses and contacts since I was a kid, and I’ve been thinking about getting my eyes lasered for a while now. I did it a couple weeks ago, and I’ve fully healed. I’m very happy to say my vision is amazing. Probably 20/20 (Will find out at my next follow-up appointment).
    In the lead up to the surgery, I challenged myself to a little art project. During every day of the last week that I’d ever wear contact lenses, I:
  6. Created a series of eye/text work. I took photos of my eyes, and incorporated writing from each day into those photos. The results were very satisfying, while some were outright surprising. Please have a look for yourself here.
    I also:
  7. Created more workweek time for myself, away from the dayjob, and towards my own work.
    This is brand new (technically starting May 1st), so I’m still understandably a little frightened, but I’m mostly stoked. I know what I want and what I want more than anything in this world is to challenge myself to become the artist that I’m meant to be. Anything less would be a violation on my soul.
    In tandem with this career shift, I’ve:
  8. Redesigned my resumé. You can view and download the pdf here.

That’s a pretty damn impressive list of accomplishments, Ash.
And that doesn’t include:

  1. Giving boxing a shot for a month (until I realized I couldn’t afford it $$$ right now)
  2. Shearing 40+ alpacas on Van Island
  3. Taking the train for a weekend trip to Seattle, or
  4. Seeing Eyedea & Abilities and P.O.S. destroy the Biltmore on 2 separate nights!

Alright, 2010 – bring on the next 8 months!!!
luv Ash

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ART, GRAPHIC DESIGN, LITERATURE, MUSIC

New Resumé, New coin gutter, Submit to Telekinesis, and LCD on The Fly

THE RESUMÉ

I’ve completed a full update of my resumĂ© !

First one I’ve made in over 3 years. Have a peek at it, please, and let me know what you think. (Look for the pdf icon at www.formatnoauto.com/#contact)

As impossible as it may seem, I tried to make my resumé intriguing.

THE COIN GUTTER

Sweetness! A new coin gutter album – for free! at www.notype.com/drones/cat.e/pan_045/

coin gutter are an amazing experimental sound group. Their early work was an onslaught of noise.
Since Pigeonless, their 2008 full length, coin gutter has extended sympathy to our damaged ears, and are offering deep, lush textures; aural pleasures.

THE TELEKINESIS

World Telekinesis Competition sounds crazy and cool.
But their logo and site disturb me. Feel like I’d be joining a religious cult.

Have a look for yourself: www.noxioussector.net/wtc
If you’re interested, the deadline for submissions is this Friday, April 30.

While I may not submit, what it’s done, positively, though, is make me think about inclusive, group art:
Get involved with other people, create competitions, projects, to challenge other people and get them excited, instead of just making things in my little world and expecting everybody else to be interested.

THE LCD ON THE FLY

In my last entry, I was freaking out (in a good way) about the new LCD Soundsystem album.
The happy buttery jolts caused by his music made me want to learn more about him.
My research lead me to his bio on THE FLY.co.uk which was a pleasant discovery for two reasons:

  1. The bio is well written, and
  2. the site as a whole looks like something well deserving of a return visit!
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ART, GRAPHIC DESIGN, LITERATURE, MUSIC, QUOTES, SPIRITUALITY

New Music, Art Mag, Art Quote, Art Survival, Crap Site, and Dark Kid’s Lit

NEW LCD STREAM

Fucking awesome: new LCD Soundsystem !!!
He’s streaming the ENTIRE album on his site: http://www.lcdsoundsystem.com/thisishappening/
After listening to it on repeat all day, it’s pretty easy to say “Dance Yrself Clean” is one of his best tracks ever and this might be his most solid album yet.
This album kills. Can’t wait to freak out to him live at Sasquatch!!!

NEW FRONT

If I haven’t already mentioned the newly redesigned Front mag, I should.
Front has been redesigned, and it’s doing so to get away from typical art criticism, which I am all for.
Very exciting. Makes me want to get involved.

HER ART IS HER LIFE

Quite a thoughtful review of Erykah Badu’s new album on Pitchfork
with a great couple of lines near the end:

Her art is her life, and her life– like anyone’s– is too messy and varied to contain. Whether or not it’s her responsibility to distill and make sense of it all is beside the point.

HOW DO YOU SURVIVE?

I like the title of this series: Quit Your Day Job.
Yes, I AM interested in finding out how my favourite artists make ends meet. Fill me in!

INCONSISTENT VISION

Royal Ontario Museum: how can it have the coolest building in Canada
AND the worst site in the world???????
This site looks like a wall of spam. I don’t want to look at a wall of ads, thank you.

KIDS ARE DARK LITTLE CREATURES

Crow Toes Quarterly (http://crowtoesquarterly.com/)
This children’s lit site is not what you’d think.
Where you might think you’d find cute characters and harmless stories with stock morality tacked on the end, you will instead find dark, playful, funny and frightening stories accompanied by mesmerizing art.
Check it out! You won’t be disappointed.

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ART, LITERATURE, MUSIC, SPIRITUALITY

Breathing Through The Struggle/Links Galore!

THE MUSIC

The Struggle

I’ve been struggling a lot lately. Trying to keep up with the pressures I place upon myself.
Then Four Tet’s “Slow Jam” comes on my headphones. My thoughts shift as I listen: The struggle is a beautiful thing (Check out the song put to video here).

More Music To Lose Yourself To

While I’m on the topic of grounding, reassuring, and hauntingly appropriate music…
Oh my goodness: new Loscil. Hell yeahs.
(I absolutely love “Second Narrows.” So much I drew a post-Valentine’s Day dedication in his name)

Dirty Album Art

As if I needed more reasons to love Madlib. Check out this beautifully haggard album cover for Madlib’s Medicine Show No. 3

More Madlib!

Oooooooh. This sounds reeeeallly promising. Guilty Simpson MC’s, Madlib provides the beats. Together they are OJ Simpson! (Hell, what can I say? Madlib kicks ass) Believe it!
Check it out here. And be sure to scroll down and listen to “Cali Hills.”

Disney Dubstep

Holy shit this is goooood dubstep:
ah ha ha ha ha – this is a Disney movie, innit? That’s wack. Bet Walt never woulda dreamt such things…

THE ART

Questioning The Creative Process

Why do we create? In this brief but direct article on the subject, Pnina Granirer offers her ideas.

Also, that article lead me to this one, in which the writer (Cora Li-Leger) shares her raw and honest story about using the creative process to make it through physical breakdown.

THE REALIZATION

I may be struggling, but I’m struggling with purpose.

As I push myself for greater growth and tackle increasingly difficult challenges, I am being exposed to more & more things that remind me why I live. Today, I mention all of these music and art news bites because they keep me going. They not only keep me in THE MOMENT, they help me live for tomorrow.

With hands in prayer, eyes closed, lungs filling, pausing, exhaling – Thank You.

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ART, LITERATURE, QUOTES

Quality Over Quantity

THE QUOTE

Although Tworkov was not known to be more than an occasional writer, he had a reputation for being an especially thoughtful artist and teacher, so that when he did publish, his peers took the articles seriously.

– Richard Kalina commenting on Jack Tworkov, Abstract Expressionist writer and painter (Art in America Dec 2009 issue)

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